Ran With A Heavy Heart

As you know, my friend and fellow marathoner Tim Feeney passed away on December 18th. I had been scheduled to run the Jacksonville Bank half-marathon on Sunday, December 21st. I had thought about not running, but decided this would be a good way to "celebrate" Tim's life. With all the things going on in the days prior to the race, I had not eaten or slept properly. I was concerned that it would be a futile attempt. A group of runners from Orlando were going, so it helped to have the support.

We drove up to Jacksonville on Sunday morning, leaving the Orlando area at 3:30am. We arrived there just before 6:00am, the race start was scheduled for 7:00am. I felt better as the start time came closer. In tribute to Tim, I wore the shirt from the 2006 Disney World Marathon. That was the only marathon Tim and I ran together, it was his first. The weather was nice about 60 degrees at the start. The cannon sounded and we were off. I wasn't sure how I would run the race, something I usually have planned well in advance of the start. I decided to let Tim's spirit guide me. I knew I was being well taken care of.

My splits were good averaging about 8:15 per mile for the first half of the race. It began to warm up in the second half of the race. I remember reaching mile 10 making the turn onto Baymeadows Road. I was starting to tire, but felt a gentle push at my back easing me forward. I knew Tim was with me giving me that extra little push I needed when it got tough. The last 300 yards of the race is on the track at the Bolles School. It is a beautiful synthetic track with spectators around the perimeter as well as in the stands. I wasn't exactly sure of my pace or time at that point, but I put on one final charge into the last turn and down the home stretch. When I saw the clock at the finish, Tim and I had achieved a new PR of 1:51:53.

The photo was taken following the race.

On Monday, we had a memorial service for Tim and said "goodbye".

The Finish Line - Tim Feeney

This is a post that I hoped I would never have to publish. Recently, I had a post telling you about Tim and Susan Feeney. I wrote about Tim's battle with brain cancer since June 2006.

Below is the e-mail that Susan sent out this morning.

"Tim lost his courageous battle this morning at 5:15am, with me at his side. It was peaceful. He ran this marathon for a long time with strength, dignity and grace. Approaching each mile marker with always the most positive attitude. He ran a 30 month race and we crossed the finish line today, together. But I stopped and he ran on. I know he's reached that special place by now and he's at peace. He will be greatly missed."

When I spoke with Susan today, I mentioned I was supposed to run tonight. Her response was instantaneous, "you better, Tim's watching!" We ran our usual route, only tonight we stopped on a dock that goes onto Lake Baldwin. We paused, gave thanks to Tim and knowing that he was watching, moved off quickly.

The evening before Tim's passing I had the opportunity to visit him one last time. Raymond and Sheri from our running group stopped by his house. Tim was resting peacefully as we spoke to him. There were no outward signs from Tim that he heard our voices. We then visited with Susan for about one hour. As we were leaving, I returned to Tim's room. I leaned over him and told him we were going to run another marathon one day. He stirred, I know he heard me and was saying, "lace them up and let's go". At 5:15 am he left us to get a good spot on the starting line. I can hear the angels telling him to go to the front you earned the elite position.

OUC Half-Marathon & 5K

Another week, another event for the Orlando runners. The photo is of some of the people from our running group; Shannon, Carol, me, Sheri, Bob (Hemingway) and Heather. They all ran the half-marathon, me I ran the 5K. I'm not sure who stuck the bottle of beer in my hand.

Over 2,500 runners participated in the event. It was a great morning for a run. The temperature was in the 50's and it was overcast. In past years this race has been run on very warm days.

Prior to the race I saw Maddy and Shirley in the crowd.

I have a couple of weeks off until the Jacksonville Bank half-marathon on December 21st.

Space Coast Marathon

Just a quick follow-up to my last post. As you can tell the theme is all about the astronauts and space travel. Above are a few of the "perks" of the race. They redesigned the finishers medal, making it about three times the size from previous years. Instead of a mylar blanket at the finish you get a colorful beach towel. The award for my 2nd place finish in my age group, is a photo of Florida taken from a space shuttle...awesome! It was a fun race.

What It's All About

I have had the priviledge of being a "Group Leader" with the MarathonFest Training Program here in Orlando, FL. I started with this program as just another runner in June 2004. Over the years, my focus has shifted from my goals, to assisting new runners complete their first marathon, or veteran runners improve their personal best times.

In June 2008, my co-leader Kim and I took to the roads with approximately 25 runners. The majority of the group was comprised of runners who had completed between one and nine marathons. As a group, we collectively had completed over 80 marathons! While the experience factor was there, the excitement and passion to train and improve was visible.

Within the group we had two runners who had never attempted to run a marathon. It would be the goal of Kim and I as leaders to help guide Aileen and Tom through 25 weeks of training. Both of them trained very hard to reach the start line of today's marathon. I could see the anticipation in their faces and their moods as it became time to test themselves on the road.

The day began slightly overcast, but very blustery. There was a wind of about 15-20mph, with gusts even higher. During the race these conditions continued. We trained for many different scenarios, heat, cold, humidity, but never wind. I have never run on such a windy day.

I was positioned near the finish area in Riverfront Park awaiting their arrival. First it was Aileen, then Tom a short time later. To paraphrase a line from the Master Card commercial, the look on their faces "PRICELESS!" It was a wonderful achievement for them to complete the marathon.

This is what running is all about. Sharing the achievements of your group, your "team". Being part of and sharing in a moment Aileen and Tom will never forget. I don't recall who said it about running your first marathon. "Nobody can ever take that away from you"!

CONGRATULATIONS to Aileen and Tom. It is runners or more importantly, people like you who keep me going. Thank You!

Thank You

I would like to thank everyone who has visited this blog and especially those who have left such heartfelt comments for Tim and Susan. A special "Thank You" to Shirley and Charlie, who added this story to their blogs.

I saw Tim and Susan on Saturday morning and Tim wanted to talk about marathons. On Sunday, another friend and marathoner Raymond, took Tim out for a walk in his wheelchair. Tim wanted to go to Cady Way Park where our training group meets for our weekend runs.

In my other blog "The Pink Bandanna", I close with "Prayers & Love". To all of you and to Tim and Susan, my "Prayers & Love".

A Moment to Reflect

The photo is of Tim and Susan Feeney. I took the photo one day after the 2007 Marine Corps Marathon. We had met at the World War II Memorial and walked around the monuments pausing to eat lunch at a hot dog truck. Best hot dog I ever had!

Tim was unable to run the marathon with us. In June 2006, several days after completing the Mickelson Trail Marathon in Deadwood, SD, Tim was diagnosed with a brain tumor. For over two years he has fought hard and endured pain and treatment which puts a marathon in the category of "a walk in the park". I often feel a sense of guilt when I complain about an ache or a pain. We can take two Tylenol and and put an ice pack on the injury and it goes away. Unfortunately, all of the modern technology and medicines could not take Tim's tumor away. Several weeks ago Tim made a decision to cease any further treatment for the tumor. He is at home with Susan and is receiving hospice care.

He has been running about the same time as myself, four plus years. We have done training runs, 5K's, 10K's, halfs and marathons together. He was a "Group Leader" in our training program, teaching new runners how to adapt to the rigors of marathon training. He helped many runners accomplish goals they never thought possible. However, no matter how hard we try, we cannot help Tim achieve the goal of health.

As runners we enter a race with the goal being the finish line. Tim is running the race of and for his life and this time we don't want to see the finish line. We want someone to declare a false start and go back to when things were fun and we laughed and told stories.

Susan has been continuing her running, in fact she completed a training run this morning. She may be tiny, but her nickname is "Big Dog". Several years ago Susan didn't think she could run with our pace group. The old saying is, "if you can't run with the big dogs, stay on the porch." Well, Susan got off the porch and ran with the "Big Dogs".

I read a quote from Olympic champion Jesse Owens that's speaks to the battle Tim is facing. "The battles that count aren't the ones for gold medals. The struggles within yourself - the invisible, inevitable battles inside all of us - that's where it's at."

Please keep Tim and Susan in your prayers.